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Man Of The Week – Chris Unwin

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Our newest Man Of The Week is a Man who believes in the power of connection, community and creativity. More important though is the role these factors play in positively impacting our media, culture and mannerisms as a society. Chris Unwin is the Founder and Executive Director of ‘Free’, a creative studio that promotes collaboration with artists so brands can connect with millennial consumers in person, and across the social web. Chris is a founding member of two national media brand launches- MTV Canada and Dose Magazine. His unique and versatile approach to brand management is illustrated through his work with partners such as Apple, Bell, Microsoft, Nokia, RIM, Rogers, Sony, Virgin Mobile, and all major record labels, to name just a few big brands.

What may seem like a regular agency, Chris has formulated a secret recipe that promotes collaboration between brands hoping to communicate an emotion/story, creative artists who have the experience, but may lack the platform, to produce engaging content that inspires millennials. His work has given previously-unknown artists the space to showcase their talents and blossom into leading figureheads in the community who help shape our everyday culture. Chances are you’ve come into contact with branding that Chris was directly, or indirectly, involved in without really knowing the story behind the man. Check out his story below!

Age – 34

What do you do? (Work)
Founder and Executive Director of Free, and our community-powered channel, The Creator Class.

Why do you do it?
Because I believe in the power of community, creativity and entrepreneurship and that, when given the chance, our generation can positively impact our media and culture.

How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
Ultimately, I see myself as building “sandboxes” – spaces and moments in time that are opportunities for people I value to come together, share experiences, and create together. Though so much of my focus is currently applied to work, I intend to extend such a strategy to my friendships and family.

What are 3 defining moments in your life?
1. Leaving Vancouver in favour of a media/music career in Toronto.
2. Leaving a comfortable, established career path at MuchMusic and MTV.
3. Finding the audacity to start Free. Come to think of it, every defining moment has been borne out of discomfort.

What is your life purpose?
To pursue my passions for a living, and to empower others around me to do the same.

How did you tap into it?
By losing patience with my own complacency, and following gut instinct.

Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
Role Models – There are a number of careers that have informed my approach such as Stephan Sagmeister, Alain De Botton Jeff Staple, Seth Godin.
Mentors – My mother, my financial advisor and coach Josh Zweig from LIVECA.

Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
I try to maintain “Inbox Zero” daily – the act of clearing out all emails by the end of the day. By assigning tasks, and capturing action items in my productivity apps, I diminish the chance for things to fall through the cracks.

When do you know your work/life balance is off?
If I fail to make my bed in the morning. Failing to accomplish this simple first task of the day is the “canary in the coal mine” for my state of mind. This sentiment was once brilliantly conveyed by Admiral William McRaven.

Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
I felt like a fool the first time I practiced yoga. I was awkward, tangled, and feeling totally out of my element. However, over time I adjusted and it’s led to balance and positivity at some crucial points in my life.

What did you learn from it?
Embracing being terrible at a new activity can open doors in life.

If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
Establish life priorities, and stick to them. Don’t waste time on anything else.

How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
Be present. See them, listen to them, feel them consciously.

Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
To date, we’ve been fighting to make a very pro-social for profit model succeed. Though our projects have been associated to causes idiosyncratically, we’ve yet to align to a specific charity, which I’d like to change in 2017.

If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
“Now I’m Ready” by Arcade Fire

Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
Instigating collaborations centered around creativity, entrepreneurship, and the future of work with collaborators I admire. Spending my time between Toronto, New York and Europe.

What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
That one can create the conditions of their own freedom with creativity, intellect, and determination.

What One book would you recommend for any Man?
“Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter” by Liz Wiseman and Greg McKeown

Man Of The Week – Benjamin Ritter

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Benjamin Ritter has worked in the fields of public health, interpersonal development, and healthcare for the past 8 years. The last 2 years he has worked as an executive at Presence Saints Mary and Elizabeth Medical Center (PSMEMC), and runs his own consultancy practice focused on interpersonal development, dating and relationships. Ben has cultivated his leadership skills through personal and professional experiences. Through his career working in interpersonal development he has also solidified mentoring, coaching, and teaching techniques towards creating, and sustaining positive behavioral change.

Ben is a man of many talents, from authoring the book The Essentials – your one stop shop to life improvement and success with women, to hosting a live dating and relationship advice show through Dose.com, curating the Interfaith Relationships workshop, the Value Systems workshop, and co-hosting the Suave Lover podcast; featured multiple times as a top podcast in the area of Sexuality on iTunes, and host of the Live for Yourself podcast. He is a freelance writer in the topics of interpersonal development, dating, and relationships for Huffington Post, AskMen, TheGoodMenProject, ManTalks, and Elite Daily, and has been featured as an expert in a variety of other sources. Through his consultancy he has helped countless men and women with their personal development, dating, and relationship issues. He can be reached through his main website at: www.benjamin-ritter.com

Ben will also be speaking at the very first ManTalks Chicago event centred around ‘Mentorship’ on November 7th, 2016. Click here for more details and to RSVP.

Age: 31

What do you do? (Work)
Through workshops, and one on one consulting I lead people towards the change they want to see in themselves in their personal and professional lives.

Why do you do it?
Everyone has the opportunity to be satisfied and fulfilled in their personal and professional lives, but those aren’t courses that are included in school curriculums. Satisfied and fulfilled people create more satisfaction and fulfillment and are more likely to impact the world in a positive way. Improving public health through personal development and social relationships is my passion.

How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
Eventually I would like to do something on a grander scale, even though I have no idea the impact of the personal transformations that I instigate. My background in public health began with the desire to impact public health policy and maybe that is in my future but current I spark and build people into their ideal version of themselves while reframing what “ideal” means, as well as improve their dating lives and relationships. Professionally and personally I also try to bring the values of personal respect, genuine interest, and the desire for others to succeed into every single one of my relationships.

What are 3 defining moments in your life?
1) My first personal heartbreak. The memory of a love lost, and how it affected me personally was an incredible learning experience even at a young age.
2) My first professional heartbreak (losing my purpose), which ultimately led me to reframing my perspective on happiness, success, fulfillment, and dating/relationships.
3) Working a variety of jobs, especially hospitality (construction, dog walking, deli, server, retail, camp counselor, day care, a variety of brand ambassador gigs, modeling, acting, bartending, corporate healthcare, public health departments, and more – less a moment, more an experience). These experiences, especially working in hospitality has unbelievably impacted my character, and understanding of others.

What is your life purpose?
My life purpose is to value each moment and the greatness that can be found within any experience while continuing to spread my appreciation, respect, and genuine interest in the world and the people around me, and hopefully affecting positive social change on the way.

How did you tap into it?
I tapped into my purpose by failing, and having to critically think about purpose and what happiness actually is, and what it represents. Never-ending realism with gratitude helps me consistently tap into my purpose.

Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
I think that I am a product of a generation, and have specific character traits that make it very difficult for me to have a mentor unless it’s through a structured program such as life-coaching. I am extremely lucky to have such great parents, and specifically I have looked up to the intelligence, compassion, perseverance, social skill and strength that my father has displayed throughout my life.

Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
Practically every day I wake up and review the to-do list I created the night before. I focus on some of the quick ones initially and then move down the list. I also immediately stretch, do ab exercises, and drink about half a gallon of water in the morning. Later in the day I also workout with one day off during the week, which is incredibly helpful for my mind and body. Part of my day is also focusing on my relationships; calling my father and a couple friends.

When do you know your work/life balance is off?
My work/life balance is incredibly important to me and it is rarely off, just out of focus. I tend to get short tempered, frustrated, and sad when I am not living according to my values. That could be my professional or personal life is focused in areas that it should not be.

Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us. What did you learn from it?
The moment I lost the purpose I dedicated a large portion of my life towards; despite knowing that it wasn’t right for me, it still is one of the most heart wrenching memories I have. It exemplifies the effect an investment of your mind and body can have on your health and taught me how to properly manage and invest in “your purpose”. Also it’s important to know that emotions are normal, the ups and downs are part of life, feeling them and accepting them allows you to move on and forwards.

If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
There are so many pieces of advice I would want to give. If I had to choose only one, I would explain that there are no standard templates for living and never to allow someone else’s template control and impose on your life.

How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
Work towards tomorrow. Any fight in the bigger scheme of things is insignificant when you remember that you are going to be together. Your partner almost always has your best interest at heart. Give them the benefit of the doubt.

Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
Sports and soccer specifically has always played a huge role in my life. I love the Chicago Fire Foundation for what they provide to the in need and at risk youth of Chicago. I also love what Cease Fire is doing. There are just so many people doing such great things.

If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
Lean on me by Bill Withers

Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
Transforming future and current leaders like I am now but on a grander scale. I hopefully will have written another book by then, and have taken my work in-person to a variety of cities around the world.

What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
I would like there to be a movement towards institutionalized learning based on facts in regards to personal development, dating, attraction, sexuality, and relationships.

What One book would you recommend for any Man?
Reframing by Richard Bandler and John Grinder

 
If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]

Man Of The Week – James Butler

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This week we get to feature a Man who’s story and journey so far is so rich and powerful that it will send a tingle down your spine! Our Man Of The Week is a champion and mindset coach who acts as a catalyst of change in the lives of others. James Butler was a man who dedicated his life to his career, the Canadian Forces, until a life-changing experience forced him to rethink his life, career and relationships. A true believer of human potential, so it’s no surprise today he is a Head Mindset Coach at Peak Objectives, where he empowers high-performing leaders to better serve their surrounding communities and beyond. A young and accomplished young Man, James opens up and shares vulnerable and moving stories from his past in this week’s edition of Man Of The Week.

Age: 27

What do you do? (Work)
I am the champion’s coach. What does this mean? I am the catalyst of change – the ripple in high-performing leaders’ lives helping them champion their cause to make powerful impact in their companies and communities.

Why do you do it?
I was a man dedicated to my career, family and future. But not long ago, I lost everything. A life-threatening injury and the results left me without my career, partner or physical health. I was at a cross-road: slip into a bottomless abyss or build a life from scratch. I chose the latter and dedicated myself to moving leaders forward – and helping humans realize their true potential.

How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
There are three main ways I make a difference. In my private practice, I help leaders center their personal power and better serve the world. In my wider business community, I train world-class coaches in an intensive program out of Seattle, called Accomplishment Coaching. In my personal life, I put service at the forefront: by volunteering and public speaking, I support initiatives to build stronger, happier communities.

What are three defining moments in your life?
– My first defining moment exploded from nowhere. In 2010, while trudging through an endless Afghani grape field – it was my job to walk ahead of patrolling Canadian Forces troops and clear explosive devices from roads, pathways and buildings – a member of the supporting Afghan National Army stepped on an improvised explosive device (IED), just 15 feet from where I stood. Time crawled like a slow-motion video and I wondered if I were still alive. As the ringing throbbed in my ears, my senses quickly returned. I immediately yelled for everyone to stop and stay still. In war, if there’s one bomb, there are always more. While rockets fired at us, my fellow soldiers stood stalk-still as I examined the ground at their feet; we had stumbled upon an IED ‘minefield.’ Over the next four hours, in 58-degree-Celius heat, I became an artist, locating and clearing bombs with a paintbrush and my fingers. On that day alone, I personally cleared five IEDs that would’ve killed us all. On that day, I learned the true potential of the human mind and our power to overcome anything.
– My next defining moment came from another rather uncomfortable predicament. I’d returned from Afghanistan and had been training for five-years to become a prestigious, sought-after bomb-clearance diver. Essentially, a highly-specialized professional diver who dismantles bombs under the sea – a tradition dating back to WW1. After years of grueling training, I had finally arrived at my ‘dream job.’ Unfortunately, during an advanced course, I suffered catastrophic failure of my left lung, while deeper under the ocean than most have ever gone. I awoke hospitalized, with a chest full of tubes and significant internal bleeding. The doctors didn’t think I would make it and suggested I make peace with my family. Obviously, I pulled through. But on the other side of the scalpel was a long road to recovery: I’d lost 65lbs, had a chest riddled with holes and was unable to walk. This was the wake-up call I needed. This injury was my catalyst to create a life of service – and a company that helps high-performing individuals reach their apex, without having to experience the hardships I’ve faced.
– As I continued my recovery, and embraced my new career path, I discovered the joy of a true client breakthrough. We’d been working together for three months. This client had a really successful life and career. He just wanted to brush-up his skills, develop new insight and perhaps embark on the road to retirement. But one day, we had a phone call and he unlocked something in himself that had always been there, but which he didn’t know how to access. Our call was powered by energy and emotion, but I thought maybe it was just temporary. But, over the next few weeks, he completely reinvented himself. Instead of retiring, he transitioned to a new career and powerfully claimed the life that had eluded him for more than 60 years. I learned that in a simple, yet powerful moment – at any moment – we have the power to change our lives. And I’ve learned to live in perpetual awe of how amazing life can truly be. 

What is your life purpose?
My life’s purpose is to be the conduit for human potential. And, as a result, foster a culture of growth and love not greed and fear.

How did you tap into it?
Every great coach has a coach; by delving into my own ‘self’ with my coach, I’m consistently reconnecting with my life’s purpose.

Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
Rich Litvin, a high-performing LA-based coach. This man coaches with heart-centered power. He’s impacting world leaders and revolutionizing the coaching industry. Power over Profit!

Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
I strictly adhered to a morning ritual, which includes meditating, affirming and visualizing the life I want, as well as exercising, reading and writing. Check out the Miracle Morning for a strong example of what this looks like.

When do you know your work/life balance is off?
I know my balance is off if I’m struggling to connect with my tribe – and am so focused on my clients I forget to look after my own well-being. When this occasionally happens, I dial it back and schedule more time for myself and the people I love.

Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
I was recently gave a keynote to the University of Minnesota’s Division 1 football team. As I was presenting to 200 of the biggest, best athletes the school could recruit to their top-tier organization, a player asked what inspired me to believe in the impossible. I told him, almost regretting my vulnerability as the words escaped my mouth, that I’d had a reading disability my entire life – and the day I stopped using that as a crutch and began searching for solutions, my life changed. Confessing to 200 professional athletes that I’d always had trouble reading was… crazy! But, my vulnerability – this defining moment – had an incredible result: it humanized me and created a safe space for valuable conversations. (And, since you’re wondering, I have a rare visual disability that makes words dance on the page.)

What did you learn from it?
We all have a story, a ‘dirty little secret,’ we don’t want others to find out about us, because fears tells us our secret will sink us. I learned that’s simply not true.

If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
Don’t be a dick. You can have money, power and all the influence in the world… But if you’re a dick, all the money in the world can’t save you from yourself.

How do you be the best partner (boyfriend/husband – past or present)
When you’re in a relationship with the right person, for the right reasons, it’s a lot easier to put your best foot forward. I’m in a relationship that a) supports me in my life goals and b) allows me to express love, joy, admiration and companionship. If you’re in a relationship for the right reasons, you can, for the most part, be the right partner. Oh and that whole not-being-a-dick thing… Kindness and mutual respect win every time in my books.

Do you support any charities or not-for-profits? (Which one(s) – and why?)
The main non-profit I support now is Lifetime Networks – an organization partnering positive influencers with members of the disabled community. Almost like a Big-Brothers-and Big-Sisters for people with disabilities. This non-profit helps disabled people continue adventuring, exploring and living a vibrant life, despite their physical and mental limitations. In a materialistic world that glorifies the pursuit of ‘more,’ working with this incredible group of people helps me live in the moment, stay humble, laugh often and never forgot to help those in need. One day, I may find myself in need too and would be thankful for people willing to step up.

If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
‘Lean on’ by Major Lazer – “it hits me just right”

Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
I see myself on a stage in front of tens-of- thousands of people, creating a movement of champions.

What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
That this world can work for everyone. We can all have a life of joy, peace and abundance while taking care of others.

What One book would you recommend for any Man?
The Motivation Manifesto, by Brendon Bruchard.

If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]

Man Of The Week – Jeff Sanders

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This week’s ‘Man Of The Week’ is Jeff Sanders! Seven years ago, Jeff began his journey of personal growth after reading his first personal development book. This kickstarted an ongoing journey of reading incredible books, listening to inspiring podcasts and asking himself tough life-changing questions. After taking all of this in, Jeff realized an inner desire to help others achieve their dreams, which he does today by reaching tens of thousands of people world-wide with his podcast, The 5AM Miracle Podcast. In addition to hosting his own podcast, Jeff is a personal coach, he travels for public speaking events, is an author and a marathon runner!
 

  1. Age: 30
  2. What do you do? (For work)
    I am a productivity coach, host The 5 AM Miracle Podcast, and an upcoming author of “The 5 A.M. Miracle,” which is launching in December of 2015.
  3. Why do you do it?
    I spent years reading phenomenal books, listening to fascinating podcasts, and changing my life in dramatic ways because of the inspiring information that others shared. I knew I wanted to emulate those people and share my story. That’s what I do now.
  4. How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
    My podcast reaches tens of thousands of people every month all over the world and I receive emails from fans nearly every day. This is certainly where I get the biggest reach with my work and the greatest impact. It’s hard to say if I’m making a tangible difference in the world, but I know that people are making real changes and seeing real results based on the strategies I share, which is incredible and humbling.
  5. What are 3 defining moments in your life?
    1. The first occurred at age 23 when I read my first personal development book, “Your Road Map for Success” by John Maxwell. This book started my personal growth journey and changed the entire course of my life and work.
    2. The second is when I switched to a raw vegan diet at age 25. Eating nature’s best every day has fundamentally improved my health and outlook on the world.
    3. The third occurred at age 28 when I launched my podcast. Nothing has pushed my business forward faster than talking on a microphone once a week and sharing stories with the world.
  6. What is your life purpose?
    To help others achieve their life’s grandest goals by dominating their day before breakfast.
  7. How did you tap into it?
    This took years to finalize, and in many ways I’m still working on it, but the process consisted of asking myself tough questions while constantly experimenting with new ways of life and reading as much as possible.
  8. Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
    I have many role models, most of which include successful authors, speakers, and entrepreneurs. Right now I am modeling much of my life and business off of Michael Hyatt, Darren Hardy, and Dean Karnazes.
  9. Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
    I have many daily habits and I switch them up all the time. Some of my best habits include waking up early, drinking 1 liter of water first thing, making a large green smoothie for breakfast, exercising before work, and making time for daily reading.
  10. When do you know your work/life balance is off?
    If I haven’t exercised in a few days I know that I’m too busy. I am good at eating healthy and getting enough sleep most of the time, but I know right away if I am working too much when I don’t have enough time for running.
  11. Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
    On one of my podcast episodes I shared my history with drug use. I normally never get that personal on my show, but I thought I owed it to my audience to share what I’ve been through and how that has shaped my decisions today. It was easier to discuss than I expected, and the response was very positive, which encourages me to be more vulnerable in the future.
  12. What did you learn from it?
    I learned that living openly and authentically is far more ideal than trying to clean up a public image. Whenever I open up and share more about who I really am with others I always feel more confident and others trust me more.
  13. If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
    Don’t sell yourself short. Pursue ambitious goals and let yourself grow into the experience. Everyone is scared and everyone is faking it all the time. Be willing to fail as you pursue big goals and watch as you amaze yourself.
  14. How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
    There is not doubt that genuinely and intentionally listening is key to a successful relationship — and I need to work on this one skill more than any other. The more I listen to my wife the closer we are as a couple and the more we appreciate one another.
  15. Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
    As a vegan I have supported a variety of charities over the years that help animals (PETA, ASPCA, etc.) and my wife and I also sponsor three children around the globe through World Vision.
  16. If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
    “Smiling” by T-Spoon
  17. Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
    I am working on phasing out coaching in order to speak full-time, along with selling online courses designed around productivity. Ideally, I will be working on my next book and traveling as I talk about my first book.
  18. What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
    I try to embody a life filled with energy and positivity. I see enormous potential in my own life when I am optimistic and filled with enthusiasm about ambitious goals I am working towards. If anything, I would hope that future generations challenge themselves to be so much more than what society asks them to do. The bar is too low for most people and I want to inspire others to push further than they every imagined possible for themselves.
  19. What One book would you recommend for any Man?
    “Ultramarathon Man” by Dean Karnazes is an outstanding book. Though technically it’s about running, it’s really about so much more. Dean embodies a life of ambition and pushing the boundaries. Even if you never plan to run a single mile, this book will challenge you to think bigger and push yourself past your own limiting beliefs.

 
If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]

Your Ultimate Pathway To Personal Growth: Feedback That Hurts

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One of our deepest human needs is to grow, develop and become better today than we were yesterday, and that is not easy.
We associate growth and development with pain because they usually mean change; we need to do things differently to achieve different results and get different outcomes.
To do things differently is to explore areas we aren’t familiar with, use skills we haven’t mastered, develop and evolve processes we haven’t perfected.
What it comes down to is stepping into unfamiliar grounds, putting ourselves on the line and being more liable to fail. That scares the heck out of us and makes the pathway to our personal growth seem harder than it really is, to the point we avoid it at any cost.
That pathway is feedback; it’s the one thing that matters most for any personal growth or development to take place. Without feedback, you have no idea what’s the true value you’re creating, what your impact is and how your results are received by the outside world.
However, not every feedback is valuable feedback. In fact the only feedback that really matters, the only feedback that is valuable, and the only feedback that makes a real difference, is the feedback that really, really hurts!
What is feedback that really hurts? It’s the one that looks like an attack on you, your personality, ideas, values, what you stand for, your work, what you do, your actions, behaviours, everything you’re part of, everything you represent, everything you are, everything that is you.
The worst part about feedback that really hurts is that it never looks like feedback. It always looks like an attack, it comes with anger and it usually forces you to shut down, stop listening, raise your shields, put up your defences, and attack back.
Why feedback that hurts? Why not regular feedback?
When people are angry and in an attack mode, they’re usually not reserved, and the rational part of their brain that usually sugar coats feedback with bullshit icing is temporarily unavailable to them. As a result, they will share their raw thoughts using the first words that occur to them. That is the most honest and most valuable feedback you can get.
Could that be why Steve Jobs got remarkable results from his team? Jobs is known for being unapologetically direct and rude. So if he thought a piece of technology is shit, he would not say “thank you, why don’t you try harder and do your best the next time.” He would get angry and call it “a piece of shit.” That is a super clear response that means you really need to go back to the drawing board and rethink the whole damn thing.
If you got that kind of feedback, there is no doubt in your mind that you need to be rethinking the whole thing and innovating the heck out of it. You just can’t rationalize your way around such feedback, and you won’t misunderstand it.
Recently I got into an argument with someone I work with, we both got angry and the argument turned into a shouting match. I wasn’t listening, I was ready to defend myself, I wanted to win and prove I was right.
When I calmed down and thought things through, I saw things differently; ‘that was feedback.’
Yes, he probably didn’t intend for what he said in the argument to be feedback, he was just angry about a few things and upset from me. But when I thought about it as feedback, that completely shifted my response, and instead of seeking an apology from him, I asked for more ‘feedback.’
So we met a couple of days after and I asked him to share with me everything that was coming in the way of us working together as one team and preventing us from collaborating. In plain terms I asked, ” tell me where you think I fucked up, what was I doing wrong and what issues do you have with me?”
I listened as he shared all the things that caused him to be angry at me. I realized that I had no idea of the unintended impact of things I said or did. It was the best feedback anyone could’ve given me about how I show up for that team and the impact I have on them.
I recalled some arguments I had with people I worked with in the past. How different would our results and relationships be if only I saw their anger, frustration, and the hurtful things they said as feedback?
How valuable would it be for you to get this kind of unedited, unfiltered, honest feedback? Are you able to see anger, argument, and disagreement as feedback? Are you able to get curious about the reasons behind these reactions and ask questions to find out?
You don’t have to wait until you get involved in an argument or someone gets angry at you. You can start getting feedback today by asking the people in your life and the people you work with open questions like:
– What is there between us that is unresolved?
– What is there for me to clean up or address?
– What do you really think of my work?
– What do you really think of my behavior?
– What do you really think of the way I conduct myself?
– What impact do I have on our work and our relationship at work?
– What do you really think of the way I show up at work?
– What are my strengths?
– What are my weaknesses?
– Where do I mess things up?
– Where did I fuck things up?
Make sure you ask the questions and listen intently to the answers. Create a safe space for them to be brutally honest and direct with you. The last thing you want to do is argue with them, negate what they are saying, or point out how they are wrong. That will not go well. The moment you start doing that, people will shut down and will get back to sugar coating their answers and giving you bullshit feedback. What’s worse is that you will mostly show up as someone who doesn’t listen and only interested in your own opinion.
Warning: Honest and direct feedback is going to be hard, sometimes very hard. So breathe through it. And remember feedback about you is not an accurate representation of who you really are, it’s just the way that person sees you and how you showed up to them in the past. You can change that and turn things around.
With every feedback session you conduct, you will have a more accurate representation of your personal brand and how you show up in the world. You will start to recognize certain patterns of things you say and do that are shaping how people see you and deal with you.
Such valuable feedback paves the ultimate pathway to personal growth. Even before you start doing or saying things differently, just the fact that you are asking for this kind of feedback will cause people to start to see you in a very different light. They will respect you more, they will be more open and honest in how they deal with you. This is a very different way to operate, one that will enable you to generate very different results.
You now have information you can act on. It’s up to you to choose what you’re going to do with it. You can ignore it, or use it to become the person you are meant to be and create a remarkable impact in the world.
 

Hussein Hallak is a serial entrepreneur with 22+ years of startup experience in strategy, branding, marketing, and growth. Hussein started 6 successful companies, worked on projects for Fortune 500 companies and World’s Top 100 Brands, and was featured in Forbes, BBC, and Entrepreneur. 

Currently Hussein is the Director of Strategy and Marketing at 3 Tier Logic, a shopper marketing and engagement software startup out of Vancouver, BC. Hussein is also the Director of Marketing at TEDxStanleyPark, Advisor at Spirit Games Ltd, Head Instructor – Lean Entrepreneur Program at LaunchAcademy and Founder of InspirationInbox.com.

Hussein lives to inspire possibility, to enable people, to achieve the remarkable.

Connect with him through his website, Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram 

 

Man Of The Week – Chris Brandt

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Here at Man Of The Week, we strive to find the most awesome and inspiring men around who better the lives of the communities around North America. This week’s spotlight is no different! Chris Brandt believes it is every single person’s responsibility to positively impact the world around, and uses his life’s work at ‘Music Heals’ to teach others how music can promote and maintain mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health. In the years to come, Chris aims to grow Music Heals to a charity that contributes $1million/year to local music programs.

  1. Age: 43
  2. What do you do? (Work)
    Executive Director, Music Heals. Also, professor of Music Business at BCIT, and yoga teacher at YYoga and Contact Partner Yoga.
  3. Why do you do it?
    #MusicMakesMe 
    [youtube video=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VeJzcEPZURw]
  4. How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
    I teach, in all aspects of my day. When the student exceeds the teacher, the teacher becomes immortal.
  5. What are 3 defining moments in your life?
    1. The last day of every job I have ever worked.
    2. Starting a record label
    3. Crossing Tibet in a jeep
  6. What is your life purpose?
    To teach
  7. How did you tap into it?
    I have always known, although sometimes I have had poignant reminders.
  8. Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
    Dalai Lama
  9. Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
    Leave the office for coffee. Never make coffee at work. While it costs more, leaving your desk and going for a walk can completely reset your day.
  10. When do you know your work/life balance is off?
    My body knows. Hopefully I am listening before it has to yell.
  11. Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
    Being diagnosed with prostate cancer.
  12. What did you learn from it?
    That I signed up for it. This was my PhD course.
  13. If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
    Do what you say you are going to do.
  14. How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
    Listen
  15. Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
    Music Heals, all day every day.
  16. If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
    “Life’s What You Make It” by Talk Talk
  17. Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
    Married with 1 kid (and maybe another on the way), traveling with my family and work, and Music Heals being a $1million/year charity.
  18. What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
    It is not your opportunity, but your responsibility, to do big things that have a positive imact on the world.
  19. What One book would you recommend for any Man?
    The Alchemist

If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]

Man Of The Week – Graham Snowden

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This week’s Man Of The Week is a shining example of what is possible when one lives true to his/her purpose. In addition to fundraising over $600,000 for charities since 2008, Graham Snowden is changing the lives of many men by showing them their true potential and allowing them to channel their purpose in everyday actions. Running numerous multi-day marathons, some up to 250km, Snowden strives to be an example of what is possible.

  1. Age: 34
  2. What you do you do? (Work)
    I live my life’s purpose – to be a constant & expanding example of what is achievable, reminding everyone that they are larger than themselves, recognize what they are truly capable of and I activate them to fulfill that potential so they in turn activate others to fulfill theirs. I believe that health is the absolute foundation for everything we want to achieve.
  3. Why do you do it?
    For the first-class, front row centre ticket to an individual’s growth and belief in his or herself. There is nothing sweeter.
  4. How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
    Staying true to my life’s purpose.
  5. What are 3 defining moments in your life?
    – Completing my first multi-day running race in Nepal. 250km self-supported. It showed me how little I know about myself; making me excited to spend my life having an amazing relationship with myself.
    – Overcoming a difficult time during university & emerging with the approach that if I ever have an idea that I believe will make someone else happy, I will act on it.
    – Standing up as my brother’s best man, looking at his elated wife and knowing that was the happiness I wanted to cultivate and nourish in my own relationship
    6. Graham Snowden & his team at The Coastal Challenge Rainforest Run
    Graham Snowden & his team at The Coastal Challenge Rainforest Run
  6. What is your life purpose?
    See #2! 
  7. How did you tap into it?
    It was a purposeful and intentional process. I cannot isolate the starting point. It emerged after several ultra-distance races, the cultivation of an amazing love-filled partnership, and consistent personal development focused on uncovering and constantly being my best self.
  8. Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
    There are several. My fiancée because she is so incredibly giving of herself and “the peaceful quiet she creates for me” (yes those are Dixie Chicks lyrics). A relative who overcame addiction who showed me you can always change where you are. Bill Chalmers, an outstanding personal development & business coach who has guided me through breaking down limiting beliefs. 
  9. Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
    I book end my day. Morning = Wake up. Hydrate (500ml – 1L). 15 – 30 minutes personal development (usually reading). Exercise at least 30 minutes (often more). A clean, low-glycemic breakfast along with my personalized vitamins. All to start my day. I write intentions for a variety of elements of my day from important business meetings to how well I want to sleep. Night = I end my day by journaling in the positive about whatever happened, no matter what happened and tracking 4 key daily habits that move me towards my most important goals. The last thing I do before I go to bed is to write on a chalk board in our kitchen something I am thankful for about my fiancée from that day.
  10. When do you know your work/life balance is off?
    I don’t actually believe in this concept. I believe in life balance. Your life isn’t comprised of work and then everything else. If it is then yes, you are definitely OFF balance. And you should probably connect with me so we can change that. If I am not writing my intentions and doing daily personal development I know that very same day that my balance is off.
  11. Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
    Just one moment?! I just quoted Dixie Chicks lyrics in this interview! They can happen every day. Asking my fiancée to marry me, asking her dad for permission, losing a job, in a job interview, starting a business, before a speaking event – it can be a pretty long list.
  12. What did you learn from it?
    I have become willing to be vulnerable because it is always an opportunity to grow and demonstrate to the world who I am.
  13. If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
    Love yourself. 
  14. How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
    I try to be the best for my partner. I am not seeking to be the best in the history of partners ever. We have daily thankfuls. I demonstrate my love as often as possible; both big & small gestures. When she comes home I also stop whatever I am doing and welcome her. I always suggest writing out in compelling detail what your ideal partner would be like. Then you MUST write out in just as compelling detail who YOU need to be in order to attract, nourish and love that person.
  15. Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
    I have led the fundraising of over $600,000 since 2008. I have supported the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, MenCap, Red Cross, Boston One Fund, imagine1day, Blessings for Backpacks, and many others. Going forward I most likely to support environmental related charities focused on preserving the most magnificent places on our planet from forests & mountain ranges in BC to the farthest reaches of the planet. It is in these places that I have become who I am. I want to preserve these places for others to enjoy. 
  16. If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
    Oh it would have to be a mashup of highly questionable yet entertaining song selections. Let me answer it this way, during the closing credits to my life “You’ve Got A Friend” by James Taylor would be playing.
  17. Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
    On a horse named Falcor.
  18. What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
    Health, happiness, and the planet. 
  19. What One book would you recommend for any Man?
    I’ll go with the first book that came to mind (and not just for men). “By the River Piedra I Sat Down & Wept” – Paulo Coelho. To me it is far superior to the Alchemist.

If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]

Embracing Pain with an Open Heart as an Emotionally Sensitive Guy

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Growing up, it was a struggle for me to feel a sense of belonging regardless of where I lived or who was in my life. It seemed like I was living in my own world most of the time and seemingly oblivious to what was going on around me. I always felt somehow different and disconnected. It felt like there was something wrong or missing in my life that I couldn’t quite grasp.
This presented me with a massive challenge throughout most of my life, as the core need I sought after was to feel loved and connected to others. But it seemed that no matter how hard I attempted to prove to others how “worthy” I was of their acceptance, it would only push people away.
This led to a lot pain and suffering as I could not understand why others would seemingly just gravitate towards each other in close friendships and romantic relationships and yet I was struggling to barely fit in.
My subconscious belief at the time was that people didn’t accept me because I was not “good enough” for them. I believed that if everyone simply saw how smart, resourceful, creative, and kind I was, that people would finally accept and love me.
But the harder I tried, the more people pushed me away. I was constantly ostracized by my peers and rejected by women that I conveyed interest in. These experiences further ingrained the belief that I was inherently unlovable and worthless if others would not accept me.
It was only later in my early 20’s, when I began to work on myself more seriously, that I realized how disconnected I was from my emotions and learned to shut myself down to avoid feeling all the pain and heartbreak I experienced in my life.
I actually took pride in my ability to remain completely emotionally detached from life and live up in my head. I believed that relying on emotions was a weakness and made us flawed and illogical which held us back.
This inclination towards valuing knowledge over emotion served to help me grow intellectually very rapidly. However, my relationships suffered immensely. I began to see that no matter how “smart” I got, or how much stuff I knew, it did not seem to win me any friends or make me any happier. I only managed to grow more lonely and depressed as time went on.
It was time to make radical changes in my life. I needed to shift my priorities and values to allow myself to begin truly experiencing my emotions and doing what it took to finally be “happy” and feel connected to others. This decision took me down the path of serious emotional healing work.

“… without a doubt the heart is an inexhaustible source of love, insight, and intelligence that far surpasses that of the mind.”
― Baptist de Pape

It felt like I had opened my own emotional Pandora’s box and was not prepared to handle what came out. All my old wounds involving my insecurities, abandonment, rejection, and heartbreak rushed to the surface screaming for my attention.
Growing up I had accumulated a plethora of experiences to ingrain the belief that I was worthless and unlovable, from regular bullying in school to mental abuse at home. I adapted to absorb it all by shutting down emotionally so I wouldn’t have to feel the pain. However, if you shut yourself off from feeling pain, you also shut yourself off from experiencing much of anything else too.
Until then, I never considered myself an emotionally sensitive person. But after beginning to navigate this unknown emotional landscape, my only impulse was to attempt to shut down again in the hope of avoiding the intensity of a lifetime’s worth of pain.
On this journey of healing, I recognized and began to embrace my emotional sensitivity as a gift. And the lesson that I am continually reminded of (often painfully) is that we must learn to keep our hearts open despite the pain.

“When you open to your heart, your entire world changes–it opens up around you. You see yourself as part of a friendly universe, one that is full of possibility, one that is generating and regenerating a positive energy.”
― Baptist de Pape

My greatest breakthroughs and lessons came from staying with the pain and continuing to remain present with my feelings rather than shutting down. As an emotionally sensitive person, it’s easy to become overwhelmed and simply to shut down and build up walls in attempt to protect your heart.
I had suffered many years before I learned this powerful lesson that completely shifted my experience. It didn’t shield me from other inevitable pain and disappointments, but it provided me with the capacity to continue feeling my feelings despite the circumstances.
It has made me and my heart stronger knowing that I am capable of moving through any experiences that may arise, no matter how challenging. In the face of great emotional turmoil, I will stand my ground and not run away or shut down.

“The power of the heart is to be connected with who you are at the deepest level.”
~ Eckhart Tolle

This is ultimately the path of true transformation and growth. If we truly wish to experience the fullest depth of our being and what is possible for us, then we must have the courage to face ourselves and continue to keep ourselves open.
 
27452285564476.LvXmKGeoHA8XFcMkttiQ_height640Alexanndre Levan is dedicated to living a self-actualized life. He shares his facility to bring wisdom and consciousness teachings down-to-earth to empower those on the path of spiritual awakening. He is especially committed to illuminating and activating the path for Millennial Leaders to live meaningful and purposeful lives, realizing their potential through embracing the higher-consciousness that is coming into the world today.
Connect with Alexanndre on his blog and Facebook Page

8 Presence Practices For The Activated Entrepreneur

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We always look for the next big breakthrough or big thing to take us to the next level of success. However, it is in the small, simple practices that we do day in and day out that true success will become inevitable.
Here are 8 Presence Practices that will help you live your life and run your business with more presence, personal power and appreciation for the gift of life.
Do Something you Enjoy Every Day:
I usually wake up before the sun (something I had to train myself to do and now love). I spend the first hour of my day stretching, strength training and enjoying a short meditation practice. I then grab my smoothies and head to the golf course for 18 holes with my buddy Ted and dog Sasha (yup, I play at a course that allows dogs). Golf is my four-hour daily presence practice and as I train to play professional it is really teaching me to step up my game in all aspects of my life. By the time I get home from playing I’ve already had a super fulfilling day, and I’m ready to dive into my work. This practice of filling my cup first thing in the AM is a great way to live a fully activated life and become a magnet for awesome people and experiences because of the happy energy I radiate. Can’t recommend it enough!
Live with Intention:
We can learn to harness and strengthen our power as conscious Creators and activated entrepreneurs by living with grounded, clear intentions. I always write down my intentions for the new year, month, week and day ahead. This helps me to stay focused so that when I do go off course I am able to easily come back to my original intent. Knowing ourselves is the key to knowing what we want — this is where a daily practice of meditation and listening really helps. Be intentional to be powerful.
40 Breaths before Work (minimum):
The excited part of me loves diving into my work as soon as I get home from golf. But the wise cracker inside of me knows that I’m way more grounded, clear, intentional and efficient when I follow this practice of connecting to my breath before I open my laptop. 40 breaths takes very little time and it gets me grounded, connected and crystal clear causing my productivity to skyrocket. Days that I skip this important step I find myself scattered, easily distracted and spending more time on Facebook than necessary.
Have Wi-Fi Free Days:
My wife Celeste and I have Wi-Fi free Sundays where we hang out in a world without Wi-Fi. What do we do with all of our spare bandwidth on Wi-Fi free days? We hike with our dog Sasha, work in the garden, make love, sleep in, snuggle late, make great food, pray about our next steps, trade massages, go for an adventure and sometimes we get rebellious and catch up on laundry. I cherish our days without internet.
Mute the Phone and Turn off the Apps:
I know this is a tough one, but I’ve found that turning off Wi-Fi, leaving my phone up in my office and minimizing the number of apps I have to the absolute essentials, has me less distracted with my device and more present and intentional with my time both online and offline. Double win!
Get Plenty of Rest:
In order for our bodies to thrive and our mind to be alert and clear we MUST get enough sleep. Living on adrenaline jolts of caffeine and minimal sleep may work for the short-term when we gotta get shit done, but if we want to have long-lasting health, vibrancy and productivity, then we have to get out of living a fight or flight lifestyle and honour our body’s rhythms. Rest is essential.
Be in Nature at Least 60 minutes per Day:
To be present and consciously connected out in nature is such a precious gift that is healing on so many levels. I am deeply fed and nourished by spending time working, sitting or hiking out in the elements (rain, snow or shine). It takes a clear mind to create awesomeness in the world and there is no better medicine than nature. Get outside and better yet, do all your work outside if you can. I spend at least 4-5 hours outside per day and I’m a better, more focused me because of it.Exercise and Be Healthy:
Exercise and Be Healthy:
The bottom line is, if we fuel our body with the nutrients we need to thrive, and we commit to living active, healthy lives that nourish us, it becomes easy to live in gratitude for the magic of the present moment… and it is in our presence that our true power exists.
Powerful Breath Practice for Cultivating Presence:
This is a powerful meditation practice that will help you focus better, feel calmer, become more mentally clear, improve your ability to use your imagination and be more creatively inspired. It will also energize your body or help you fall asleep (depending on where you need rebalancing).
It is one of the audios from my Cowabunga Vision Quest 40 Day eCourse which you can Name your Price and register for at www.CowabungaVisionQuest.com
What are some presence practices you love to do that get you connected to your body, the moment and in touch with the powerful Creator that you are? What is one takeaway that you appreciate about this article? Please pay-it-forward and share this with your friends. Thank you!
 
Bradley MorrisBradley Morris has an absolute blast supporting people to live activated, mega-fulfilling lives. As a Lifestyle and Business coach, he helps entrepreneurs create their visions, mothers to live more in balance, young adults to discover and pursue their passions, athletes to play their game in the zone and brilliant creative types to step into their power and share their gifts with the world.
He’s launched multiple meditation eCourses that are supporting people in 20+ countries to create a daily connection practice they love and has also coached conscious entrepreneurs to create successful eCourses of their so they can free up more of their time, make a big difference in the world and enjoy all the other stuff they love to do. He is an aspiring professional golfer, husband and world adventurer. He feels so blessed to have a human body and I love my “day job!” For more about him, check out www.CowabungaLife.com

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