While life started decades ago, his real life adventure and the path to his purpose began in 2010 when he walked by himself from Canada to Mexico. Jordan Bower begun his 316-day journey most would only dream off doing. Over the 316 days he spent on his feet — first crossing Washington State, before heading down the Oregon Coast into the redwoods of Northern California, and all the way across the Golden Gate Bridge and making his way down to the white sandy beaches in Southern California — Jordan learned his story was my most valuable possession. By the time Jordan reached the Mexican border, he learned his experience gave him a story, one that would help shape his reality, as a life story does to most. Jordan also learned that storytellers were made, not born and that he had a unique ability to help people share their stories. Storytelling sets the framework for the way we engage with one another, and by changing how we tell our story, we set the foundation for meaningful and innovative work, authentic communication and mutually beneficial relationships.
In 2015, Jordan moved to the small city of Victoria, BC, where he started a communications business, offering story-telling services professionally to clients. His hard work was honoured with an invitation to teach at the Future of Storytelling Summit — an annual event in New York City that also included teachers like Al Gore, Margaret Atwood and Edward Snowden. Today, Jordan has the good fortune of working with dozens of interesting and inspired clients around the world. Each day, he learns more about integrating what he has learned on the road to benefit my clients and community.
As Jordan humbly once said, “I’m one of those lucky people who does meaningful work I love that engages my creativity. I feel privileged for what I’ve experienced, and excited for the road ahead.”
Age – 35
What do you do? (Work)
I’m a Strategic Storyteller. In my work, I help leaders, teams and brands find a more dynamic, purposeful and inclusive way to frame what they do, and to connect it with others.
Why do you do it?
We live in a time that pundits are calling the Age of Loneliness — a time when more of us spend more of our lives isolated and online. I think storytelling is the antidote. By making sense of our own stories and by listening to the stories of others, we become more conscious of who we are — and more conscious of the mystery that surrounds and fills us.
For me, it’s really fulfilling to help my clients put language around ideas they didn’t feel confident expressing before, and to restore authentic storytelling to the business world, which had rejected it. I love what I am lucky enough to do.
How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
This is a loaded question — we all make a difference in the world. The world isn’t static; it changes with us, with every conversation we have and every step we take. I don’t believe that anything I will ever do will meaningfully change what I think is bad about the world. I think that’s self-aggrandizing. Instead, I make choices that are fun, personally challenging and in integrity with my inner self. It’s an honour when those choices affect other people positively.
What are 3 defining moments in your life?
In 2010, I came home one day to find a note on my kitchen table from my girlfriend. Her closet and wardrobe were empty; she’d left me for another man. I panicked. Within weeks, I had launched a Kickstarter project, raising more than $8,000 to walk from Canada to Mexico — it was an idea that we’d had together; by launching the project, I wanted to show her how committed I was to the relationship in order to win her back.
But I couldn’t convince her. At the end of the summer, with nothing more than a backpack on my back, I left Vancouver, Canada, with the intention of walking the length of the West Coast.
That trip was full of defining moments. In the early days, I was convinced that my now ex-girlfriend would “come to her senses” and show up at my tent the next morning. It took about three weeks and 200 miles for me to realize that, probably, she wasn’t showing up. Soon, the doubt and shame I felt about having “driven her away” started transforming into deeper inquiry into myself: like, how did I end up in a relationship with someone who would leave me like that? That was a Pandora’s Box of emotional self-examination, forcing me to dive deeper into my upbringing, my past relationships, my parent’s divorce and my own sense of self-pity, helplessness and pessimism about what it would mean to actually grow up.
As I made my way south — through Washington and Oregon, and into the Redwoods of Northern California, heading for the Golden Gate Bridge — I was faced with obstacle after obstacle — opportunities, I realized for me to “take the blue pill” and stop digging deeper into myself. There were cold nights on isolated beaches; couches surfed in the meth-ridden grow ops of Northern California; sad, intimate encounters with so many strangers met along the way. I cried often — for myself, for my lost relationship, and for the people I was meeting, who were forcing me to become less judgemental of others and more compassionate — more real, I think.
It’s still hard for me to dive deep into that experience. The emotions I experienced on the way were so powerful, and so intense.
What is your life purpose?
I think, at my age, that answering this question would be inappropriate. Ask me again in 35 years.
Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
I have an increasingly intimate relationship with my own inner wisdom that I am learning to trust beyond whatever doubt arises in my head. I am incredibly indebted to a counsellor I have in Los Angeles, who has spent the last 9 years helping me better understand my spirituality — and through it, myself.
Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
Most of my habits are things that I criticize myself for — “unspiritual” things like watching sports and Facebook. I love the Toronto Blue Jays and Toronto Raptors in a way that I still don’t completely understand. One of the things I do every day is check in with last night’s sports scores, and get excited about the game ahead.
When do you know your work/life balance is off?
My body is screaming for movement, but my head is shouting for more time at the computer. My body is always right.
Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
It’s very vulnerable to be answering the questions for this blog post. My favourite form of storytelling is intimate, in person, and it’s very difficult to answer a series of questions using just my fingertips. To you, the reader, I’d love to be able to connect and share something emotionally meaningful that gets us both out of our heads. I know that you’re looking for something inspirational, like everyone else killing time on the Internet. It feels really vulnerable to try and inspire you, without knowing whether I’ll have ever been successful.
What did you learn from it?
To get out of my head, get into the flow, and to stop worrying about the consequences.
If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
There’s a great book called Iron John, which anyone who’s done some men’s work will know well. The book’s a modern re-interpretation of the old Grimm Brothers fairy tale called Iron John, which is more or less the story of a young prince learning how to be a king.
The book is great for a number of reasons — as the author says, fairy tales are humanity’s most deeply entrenched wisdom, because oral stories passed from generation to generation are like heavily filtered water — only pure truth remains. But the most important detail in the book is in the first 25 pages, when the young boy discovers the hiding place for the key to his inner man — his wildness, sexual power, creativity, confidence. Where is the key? It’s hiding underneath his mother’s pillow. The boy’s task is to take the key — not ask for the key — take the key.
The one piece of advice I have for another man is to read Iron John. If you can’t read the whole thing, read just the first 75 or so pages. And take the damn key.
How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
Stop worrying about being the best partner. Instead, in my relationship, I focus on expressing my feelings appropriately, telling the truth and being intentional in the way I choose to act. For a long time, I was very concerned with “doing things the right way”, and that obsession with being perfect spilled over to all aspects of my relationships — conversation, future planning, sex. In the past few years, I’ve focused on being real instead, and trusting my partner’s ability to communicate clearly — and, occasionally, to accept or forgive my flaws. My relationship has been much, much stronger ever since.
Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
I don’t actively support any charities. In the last few years, my focus has been on building my business, and all my available time and money has gone into that. One ambition for the future is to sit on the board of a non-profit. I think I’m still a few years away from that.
If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes, by Paul Simon. Graceland was the album I listened to most while I was walking.
Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
More entrenched in the global business community, delivering storytelling services that are world class. Travelling widely to deliver trainings and workshops. Advising large scale clients. Staying grounded. Practicing yoga 4 times a week. Rooting into a comfortable home. Anticipating life with children. Feeling happy, loving and connected with my highest self.
What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
Honestly, I have never thought about this. I hope that I never do.
What One book would you recommend for any Man?
Besides Iron John (recommended above), Gary Snyder’s “The Practice of the Wild. Beautiful, insightful, wise and freeing essays written by one of America’s greatest poets. A true modern masterpiece.
Inspiration
Man Of The Week – Jeff Perera
For over eight years, Jeff Perera has been working to help inspire new models of possibility for manhood: having spoken to men, young men and boys across Canada and beyond on how we can strive toward change within, and be part of nurturing healthier ideas of manhood where we work, live, study, worship and play. Today, Jeff is a Speaker and Facilitator with Next Gen Men, who work with young men and boys, as well as engage and educate men around conversations of toxic versus mindful masculinities. He has delivered two TEDx talks: ‘Words Speak Louder that Actions’ and ‘The Ladder of Manhood’. If that wasn’t enough, Jeff also writes over at Higher Unlearning, exploring how limiting ideas of gender impact men in everyday life. Jeff shares some poetic and inspiring words in his interview and ManTalks is honoured to have Jeff Perera as our newest Man Of The Week!
Age: 41 (but don’t look it! Being brown don’t let ya down!)
What do you do? (Work)
I am a Speaker and Facilitator with Next Gen Men. I’ve spoken to tens of thousands of young men, boys and men across Canada and abroad, for eight years, about our ideas of manhood and new models of possibility for men.
Why do you do it?
I realized years ago that how many of us answer the question of what it means to be a man, is at the core of so many of the challenges, issues and struggles that people of all genders face. Traditions and concepts of what manhood is or isn’t, impact everything; from our lives at home or work, or where we study or worship, as well as our relationship with the environment, our true self, and with each other. As men, working to give ourselves the freedom to be our best self, in turn helps nurture the world we want to live in,
How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
What I have learned again and again is: The way forward begins with us, within us. There are many men who want to explore living a more full, meaningful, heartfelt life; embracing vulnerability and fear, and not facing it all alone. I look to help men open their heart’s eye and strive to see the invisible: how these toxic ideas of manhood are both the rope used to section off people of other genders in everyday life, as well as the chain holding men back from our whole humanity. My hope is to help inspire others to genuinely begin their journey from head to heart, and from heart to action: showing up in their own lives, and the lives of others. My role is to help convey to men and boys that change must be ongoing within us, but that you are not alone and that we can take this journey together.
What are 3 defining moments in your life?
– The day I realized the person I wanted to be: as a little child witnessing my father (who was a violent tyrant at home) back down and hide in his car from a drunk man who wanted to fight him.
– The day I saw my father’s dead body.
– A quiet moment when I decided to leave a 9-5 job because I wanted to own the impact I make, and what those waves to continue to be after I’ve left this world.
What is your life purpose?
I want to be the lesson in action, and inspire others to try as well. I want to hold a mirror up for others, so we learn to truly see our role in everyday situations. That starts with role modelling the process and looking in that mirror ourselves. I want to be a gentle voice inviting you into this conversation, but also push and provoke you: make you comfortable with discomfort (that place where our real inner growth happens.)
How did you tap into it?
Too many men have a void in their lives: not having emotionally present models and mentors. I call these models of possibility ‘Maps to Manhood’, someone who you can talk to or just learn from by seeing how they navigate life. I decided to aspire to be the example I was looking for, fill the void for myself and others. That process has brought into my life amazing men from whom I learn from and unlearn with.
Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
Muhammad Ali. We can learn from anyone and everyone (and need to always listen for the lesson) but the life he lived was his message to us. Ali was the voice telling us to get back up, to stand up. Ali taught us to answer the bell, rise up, and get into the ‘Ring of our own Life’. He said: “True success is reaching our potential without compromising our values.” He demonstrated the will to work and work, battle yourself and all circumstances in order to achieve your goals, and be ready to sacrifice it all for what matters. I strive to be half the man he was.
Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
I mentioned mirrors earlier, I take a moment to look in the mirror every day. It is my reminder to not just see my physical self, but my entire self. To be present and mindful in each moment as much as I can be, and try harder than that, in order to own everything I’ve done and didn’t do. I want to focus not the impression I leave with others so much as the impact I have on others. Trying to talk to myself using loving speech also!
When do you know your work/life balance is off?
I talk more and more these days about ‘Mindful Masculinities’. When I am truly striving to be present, show up, enter the Ring of my own life: in everyday, simple moments I can tell when I am not at my best. We all have those ‘engine light’ or ‘oil change’ symbols light up on our inner dashboard: those moments when a quiet voice whispers “you need to take a break” or “put the email away and go sit with your child for a bit”.
Humbly, I would like to submit that the pursuit of ‘work/life balance’ is a fruitless chase that sets us up for failure. Instead, I believe the key is seeking to find harmony within every moment in Life. This is a fluid state where we seek to maintain amidst the ever-changing highs and lows. We are in constant motion, our lives are never truly in a stand-still state until our last breath. Life is like crossing a tightrope towards our destination, as we carry all our life’s relationships, projects, aspirations, challenges and responsibilities in our hands. The goal is to constantly seek harmony within the present moment, both when it is quiet, or when we face the gusts of Life’s winds of challenge… all while moving in a forward motion. This is our endless work: staying tuned in, learning to adjust and thrive, all while seeking to be one with this very moment.
Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
I want to be the person that reaches out to you when things are at their lowest, not someone who shows up when you are riding waves of success. I think we need to start doing that for ourselves, with ourselves.
In the very near future, I seek to openly talk about my mistakes and lessons learned. I think it is time we opened up as men and owned our shit. Taking ownership of our actions, behaviour and impact. I am writing a piece about this topic, in which I wrote: “To Men everywhere, this isn’t about the ‘Day of our Reckoning’, this is about the Day of our Awakening.”
In 2015, I started a year-long journey to explore and own my past actions and reputation, and ask myself hard questions. I did a lot of listening, talking with women from different periods of my life: colleagues, friends, acquaintances, women I’ve interacted with in community work, as well as women I dated in the past. I wanted to better know myself through the narrative others have of me, based on my impact in the community. This wasn’t solely about me, my hurt feelings or my guilt, but more about learning of any hurt or harm I may have caused.
What did you learn from it?
As a result, I started having much deeper, vulnerable conversations with men in my life, modelling how we can help one another do this emotional work together. Sharing my journey helped me open up conversations with men, as we discussed regrets, shame and fear of talking openly about mistakes, and how we need to do this work together. Instead of leaving women in our lives to do all the heavy emotional lifting for us, we can share in the emotional, healing, self-awareness work amongst other fellow men.
Ben Okri said “Stories can conquer fear. They can make the heart larger.” We can humbly share our experiences together as men, to help our own healing and learning, and others too. I started a monthly gathering in Toronto: a private circle of men I knew trying to be positive role models in our communities. There we open up and share, and listen to one another. No performance, no judgements, not as a PR move to salvage our name after a mistake made. Raw, real honest truths and buried fears. We need to model doing emotional labour together as men, where there isn’t reward (i.e. opening up with the goal of achieving romantic or sexual pursuits).
Next Gen Men has started monthly gatherings in Calgary, and soon other cities like Toronto (which I will be organizing) called ‘Wolf Pack’. (http://nextgenmen.ca/our-program/wolf-pack) These will be spaces where men can have these conversations together, open to people of all genders. Wolf Pack aims to tackle challenges of social isolation amongst adult men by helping foster social connection and new friendships through vulnerable and supportive conversations around topics of depth.
If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
I am looked to by some as an ‘expert’ on healthy masculinities, but anyone who says they have the ‘quick-fix, follow these three easy steps, just-add water’ solutions to being a better man is working a con. The path toward being your better self (not better than someone else, but better that who you were yesterday) is a lifelong journey. There are no shortcuts, no quick solutions, we have to roll up our sleeves and develop the resolution to truly face ourselves, with love. A self-love that is accountability, transparency and humility.
How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
Know Yourself.
Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
Let me tell you about three, starting with the one I work for!
Next Gen Men (www.nextgenmen.ca) is a youth-led, nonprofit organization focused on building better men through youth and peer engagement, education and empowerment. We believe that by engaging, educating, and empowering our peers, we can ensure that the next generation of men will make a positive impact on their communities.
Reclaim Your Voice (www.abusesurvivalstories.com) is a nonprofit event series which provides a platform for men and women who have experienced domestic violence, psychological and sexual abuse, to reclaim their voices. Combining raw testimonials from survivors with inspirational spoken word pieces and motivational speeches, Reclaim Your Voice is a positive and healing experience that uplifts both the mind and the soul.
FYOU: THE FORGIVENESS PROJECT (www.thefyouproject.ca) is a movement that started after rape-survivor Tara Muldoon did not find justice in the justice system. After realizing forgiveness would have to come from within, she created a platform for youth and young adults to speak openly about what it means to forgive. FYOU is now a team that runs programming and workshops internationally. The entire movement is comprised of youth and young adults.
If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
‘Sure Looks Good To Me’ by Alicia Keys.
Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
I see myself doing what I am doing today, but in different and ever-evolving ways; hopefully having learned more and grown each day from now to that moment in time.
What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
I hope to be seen as a person who left it all in the ring. I want to be someone who inspired others to reach deeper and do better: not just in my words but my deeds and actions, and the impact I had on others.
What One book would you recommend for any Man?
The Autobiography of Malcolm X
(Also: Man Up: Reimagining Modern Manhood by Carlos Andrés Gómez)
If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]
Man Of The Week – Paul Davidescu
Our first Man Of The Week for 2016 is Paul Davidescu, a local talent who co-founded Tangoo Entertainment Inc, a website and mobile application that allows users to consider moods and occasions to create the perfect dining experience in social settings. What started off as a mere idea to bring the right people together, Paul and his team have taken Tangoo to new heights where they have been featured on Dragon’s Den and CTV, to name just a few. Paul’s obsession with people and inspiring others to connect drove him to tweak his approach to growing Tangoo, where today he is an active member of the UBC Alma Matter and is constantly looking to see how he can integrate the next generation of talented and driven students into shaping the future of Tangoo and the dining experiences in Vancouver.
You can also listen to our interview with Paul on the ManTalks Podcast.
Age: 26
What do you do? (Work):
I’m the CEO of Tangoo, a free iOS app that matches your mood to the perfect restaurant experience. We work on fulfilling our mantra of creating memorable connections both between people and between consumers and businesses.
Why do you do it?
I am obsessed with bringing the right people together in memorable ways that make them happy and inspired to help each other make a maximum impact in the world. One of the most accessible and genuine ways to bring people together is by breaking bread at the dining table – something we all have in common.
By inspiring people to safely break the status quo of where they go out, we help them create new experiences that result in more memorable stories between themselves and the connections they most value in life. Deep relationships are a function of shared stories and with the tap of a button we provide a turnkey solution to create these micro-stories on the go, never settling for less than a memorable outing.
Proprietors are constantly looking to connect with the right customers by providing the most memorable experience possible. However, without being able to easily differentiate their brand, market to the right people, and build a relationship with customers, they are drowned in the competition. By focusing on the positives, Tangoo helps restaurants uniquely market what they do best today to the people that most appreciate it. We help them do it intelligently and safely without compromise of their brand.
How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
I make a difference in the world by inspiring and connecting people.
Inspiring People:
I believe that inspiring people is best accomplished through leading by example and sharing how others can do it as well. You can demonstrate impact both through business success but also through storytelling to show people that success is also well within their reach if they follow their passions. By running a business that allows me to maximize impact to all my stakeholders coupled with the opportunity to be able to tell my story through amazing mediums like ManTalks, helps me do my part to inspire.
Connecting people to inspire each other:
Connecting people I believe is the ultimate way I make a difference. Throughout my entrepreneurial journey of making people’s social lives better, I have had the privilege of getting to know large amounts of people in meaningful ways. This has allowed me to connect the dots quickly and introduce people in ways that add high value whether it is meeting an entrepreneur with the same problems, a new friend in a new city, or a mentor who has already tackled a challenge they are facing today.
Nothing helps someone conquer uncharted territory more than by connecting with someone who has either done it, or is doing it right now. People need each other for inspiration and knowledge and I believe there are still many ways in which this process can be streamlined.
What are 3 defining moments in your life?
1) I was broken down by anxiety and self-doubt in my first year of business school. It was a dark time where I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it out. With support from my close network and a newfound trust in my body to pull through this hard time, I became more humble, open for help, and confident in myself.
2) Tangoo didn’t start as a mobile app, we started by bringing people together through progressive dinners that involved people connecting across multiple restaurants in one evening. While this aligned with our mission of creating memorable offline connections between people, the business model wasn’t scaleable. We decided to pivot and reinvent the old model to go mobile coincidentally the night before a 300-person pitch at Launch Academy Demo Day – sometimes pressure makes you do bold things. We were terrified but determined to go all in. To our surprise, we won Demo Day and proved to our peers that big risks do pay off. Nothing better equips you to take on big risks than a magical experience like this.
3) Dragons’ Den was defining because of the profound learning and personal growth process it took us through both leading up to the pitch, all the way until it aired across Canada. Firstly, the process of learning our business inside out and pitching to increasingly bigger crowds of people across the community made us stronger than we would have ever imagined. To have seemingly “failed” on the show by not making a deal, we took it as a challenge to prove to people that before our airdate seven months later, we would ship our product and raise more investment at a better valuation off the show than on it. It all came together on November 26, 2014 in front of our 500-person Dragons’ Den viewing party. The episode was luckily cut in a flattering way and people were inspired by the way we used an uncertain and seemingly negative situation to fuel us to new heights. It taught both our team and community about the power of a positive attitude.
What is your life purpose?
To connect and inspire people. I always ensure that the way I make a difference (covered in question #4) in my day-to-day life connects with my underlying life purpose.
How did you tap into it?
As mentioned earlier, I have been lucky enough to tap into it through Tangoo am able to connect and inspire my team, customers, and partners. Through media and great community word of mouth, I have been able to share my journey so far through media opportunities (listen to a recent one on Roundhouse Radio) and public speaking opportunities. Nothing is more fulfilling than sharing my story to observe how it inspires current and aspiring entrepreneurs to break through their challenges and uncertainties.
Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
I have many mentors who guide me in different angles of life and through different types of problems. This is one great benefit I have been able to get from meeting so many inspiring people. On the personal end of things, it has to be my brother Jon, cousin Sam Sosa, and parents who are very grounded on many personal aspects I fight to improve while I balance them out with a demanding business. There are too many to count on the startup end of things but to names a handful who have been particularly instrumental, they are: Cameron Stewart, Henry Heeney, Peter Smyriotis, Steve Bell-Irving, Severine Arnaud, Mike Tan, Jayesh Parmar, Sean Pacey, and Nigel Tunnacliffe.
Mentors who inspire me and whom I have not all met (yet) are people like Tony Robbins & Tim Ferris (personal growth innovators), Brian Chesky (Airbnb CEO), and Simon Sinek (TED Speaking legend whom I was lucky enough to meet this summer).
Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
If I have a productive week with not so many late-night events I like to get an early start with the following routine:
– Up at 5AM
– Drink a big glass of water
– 20 minutes of reading
– 90 minutes of focused attention on something that requires intense focus and/or is very uncomfortable to do like accounting, writing business plans, goal setting or a blog post.
– A swim or run followed by 10-minutes of body weight exercises before my shower
– A healthy breakfast complemented by an episode of How I Met Your Mother
– 5-10 minutes of meditation
Throughout the day, I try to make sure I listen to a podcast as I am walking in between meetings and when I am stationary waiting for a bus, I’ll read a book or tune into what’s happening in current events. It’s an amazing way to optimize your time and learning.
I am a very introspective person and find that handy journaling apps like Day One help you gather your thoughts to be able to look back to observe how much you have grown. Now, these are all mainly habits of how to be ultra productive but ones I am working on now are how to stay in touch with my personal needs and support network around me. 2016 will be a big opportunity to build better habits in my personal life that might be overshadowed by my professional life.
When do you know your work/life balance is off?
To be honest, it’s always going to be a bit off when you run a startup. But times when I realize it’s getting a little out of control are when I feel overwhelmed, stressed, and angry. I also hear about it from my network through patterns of feedback that seem to best process in my brain when I start hearing something more than once…it’s super important to take clues from your body and from your daily interactions with people to keep this in check.
Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
Vulnerable moments are usually your most defining ones. Besides the vulnerabilities from my 3 most defining moments I shared earlier, I have had various pockets of them ranging from breakups, bullying, breeches of trust from people I have brought close into my team, and scary moments of overexerting myself physically.
What did you learn from it?
If I had to boil them into a theme it would revolve around the idea of learning how to make personal growth hacks. Moments of vulnerability that look inescapable make you much more grateful, careful, and confident than ever before after you manage to survive them. I see vulnerabilities as prime opportunities to grow as a person and also to have a strong reason to open up your mind to new people and resources the world has to offer.
If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
One can be a mentor to people in so many ways so this is a tough thing to boil down to one thing. Most of my mentoring experiences have been around helping early entrepreneurs get off on the right foot so I commonly find that there are understandably many insecurities and uncertainties an entrepreneur has to overcome. I usually advise that they do the following:
– Find out your Why. What drives you? What makes you passionate? This must be your north star.
– Don’t play hero. There are many people and resources out there happy to help and pay it forward only if you ask. Learn how to ask.
– Focus on always growing as a person. It’s essential to do before you can expect to really grow your startup and life happiness.
– Turn problems and vulnerabilities into opportunities and learnings. If you don’t, they will never go away.
– Find things that make you feel happy and empowered and don’t forget to make them habits.
How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
This is a question I hope to build great expertise in soon, as I have not been in any long-term romantic relationships. However, from the experiences I have had with other kinds of partnerships, it’s all about growing together, being empathetic, and not being afraid to be vulnerable. The best partners know exactly how to help each other grow and pull themselves out of tough situations. At the same time, it’s about being spontaneous and being able to create great excitement out of everyday things such as going out for dinner – thank goodness there’s an app for that 😉
Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
This is an opportunity to recognize some local Vancouver startups that are managing to do some amazingly innovative things with social entrepreneurship to inspire giving from the masses. One’s I have had the greatest opportunity to personally follow are Change Heroes, Chimp, Whisky Wisemen, and MealShare. Whether it is crowd sourcing how the masses builds schools or how they fight world hunger, what I love about these social enterprises is how they have made it incredibly fun and easy for the masses to give back.
If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
This was fun to Google. I would say a mashup of Bon Jovi’s “Its My Life”, Corey Hart’s “Never Surrender”, and R. Kelly’s “I Believe I Can Fly” sums it up pretty well.
Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
As I start to reach the tipping point in both my business and personal growth, I see myself continuing to power Tangoo and/or similar companies like it that focus on solving problems around discovering experiences, dating, personal growth, and helping startup companies reach their potential. I would like to take my public speaking, mentoring, and self-publishing passions to new heights and to different parts of the world.
On a personal side, I see myself making great strides in giving back to my body through increased triathlon training and personal development. I also would like to unleash the travel bug I caught when I lived in Barcelona by travelling the world with those closest to me to continue to build our relationships and the micro-stories that bring us closer together.
What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
I believe that ones legacy is a result of how much impact and inspiration they leave behind. I hope that through my commitment to create companies, stories, and schools dedicated to connecting people and fulfilling human potential, my legacy will be one that inspires others to work towards making theirs count as well.
What One book would you recommend for any Man?
How To Win Friends And Influence Others – Dale Carnegie. A classic handbook for you to know how to manage and understand people in the most basic of ways. An honourable mention is to read Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi which talks about the importance of managing your network – see the rest on my reads on my Goodreads.com profile.
If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]
Man Of The Week – Jeff Sanders
This week’s ‘Man Of The Week’ is Jeff Sanders! Seven years ago, Jeff began his journey of personal growth after reading his first personal development book. This kickstarted an ongoing journey of reading incredible books, listening to inspiring podcasts and asking himself tough life-changing questions. After taking all of this in, Jeff realized an inner desire to help others achieve their dreams, which he does today by reaching tens of thousands of people world-wide with his podcast, The 5AM Miracle Podcast. In addition to hosting his own podcast, Jeff is a personal coach, he travels for public speaking events, is an author and a marathon runner!
- Age: 30
- What do you do? (For work)
I am a productivity coach, host The 5 AM Miracle Podcast, and an upcoming author of “The 5 A.M. Miracle,” which is launching in December of 2015. - Why do you do it?
I spent years reading phenomenal books, listening to fascinating podcasts, and changing my life in dramatic ways because of the inspiring information that others shared. I knew I wanted to emulate those people and share my story. That’s what I do now. - How do you make a difference in the world? (Work, business, life, family, self)
My podcast reaches tens of thousands of people every month all over the world and I receive emails from fans nearly every day. This is certainly where I get the biggest reach with my work and the greatest impact. It’s hard to say if I’m making a tangible difference in the world, but I know that people are making real changes and seeing real results based on the strategies I share, which is incredible and humbling. - What are 3 defining moments in your life?
- The first occurred at age 23 when I read my first personal development book, “Your Road Map for Success” by John Maxwell. This book started my personal growth journey and changed the entire course of my life and work.
- The second is when I switched to a raw vegan diet at age 25. Eating nature’s best every day has fundamentally improved my health and outlook on the world.
- The third occurred at age 28 when I launched my podcast. Nothing has pushed my business forward faster than talking on a microphone once a week and sharing stories with the world.
- What is your life purpose?
To help others achieve their life’s grandest goals by dominating their day before breakfast. - How did you tap into it?
This took years to finalize, and in many ways I’m still working on it, but the process consisted of asking myself tough questions while constantly experimenting with new ways of life and reading as much as possible. - Who is your Role-Model or Mentor?
I have many role models, most of which include successful authors, speakers, and entrepreneurs. Right now I am modeling much of my life and business off of Michael Hyatt, Darren Hardy, and Dean Karnazes. - Do you have any daily habits? If so, what are they?
I have many daily habits and I switch them up all the time. Some of my best habits include waking up early, drinking 1 liter of water first thing, making a large green smoothie for breakfast, exercising before work, and making time for daily reading. - When do you know your work/life balance is off?
If I haven’t exercised in a few days I know that I’m too busy. I am good at eating healthy and getting enough sleep most of the time, but I know right away if I am working too much when I don’t have enough time for running. - Vulnerability is a challenge for most men – share a vulnerable moment from your life with us.
On one of my podcast episodes I shared my history with drug use. I normally never get that personal on my show, but I thought I owed it to my audience to share what I’ve been through and how that has shaped my decisions today. It was easier to discuss than I expected, and the response was very positive, which encourages me to be more vulnerable in the future. - What did you learn from it?
I learned that living openly and authentically is far more ideal than trying to clean up a public image. Whenever I open up and share more about who I really am with others I always feel more confident and others trust me more. - If you are or were going to be a mentor for another man, what is one piece of advice you would give him?
Don’t sell yourself short. Pursue ambitious goals and let yourself grow into the experience. Everyone is scared and everyone is faking it all the time. Be willing to fail as you pursue big goals and watch as you amaze yourself. - How do you be the best partner (Boyfriend/Husband- past or present)
There is not doubt that genuinely and intentionally listening is key to a successful relationship — and I need to work on this one skill more than any other. The more I listen to my wife the closer we are as a couple and the more we appreciate one another. - Do you support any Charities or Not-for-profits? (Which one(s) and why?)
As a vegan I have supported a variety of charities over the years that help animals (PETA, ASPCA, etc.) and my wife and I also sponsor three children around the globe through World Vision. - If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
“Smiling” by T-Spoon - Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
I am working on phasing out coaching in order to speak full-time, along with selling online courses designed around productivity. Ideally, I will be working on my next book and traveling as I talk about my first book. - What legacy do you want to leave for future generations?
I try to embody a life filled with energy and positivity. I see enormous potential in my own life when I am optimistic and filled with enthusiasm about ambitious goals I am working towards. If anything, I would hope that future generations challenge themselves to be so much more than what society asks them to do. The bar is too low for most people and I want to inspire others to push further than they every imagined possible for themselves. - What One book would you recommend for any Man?
“Ultramarathon Man” by Dean Karnazes is an outstanding book. Though technically it’s about running, it’s really about so much more. Dean embodies a life of ambition and pushing the boundaries. Even if you never plan to run a single mile, this book will challenge you to think bigger and push yourself past your own limiting beliefs.
If you know a Man that is making a positive impact on the world, we would love to hear from you! Contact us at [email protected]