Phil T Mistlberger is an expert on masculinity and brotherhood and has worked in this space for over 30 years. He is the author of four critically acclaimed books on the subject of men’s work and is the founder of The Samurai Brotherhood. Phil discusses the differences between men today vs. back 20-30 years ago and what the men of today’s generation are seeking the most.

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] Who is Phil and how did he get started?

[7:00] Phil discusses Robert Bly’s book, Iron John and the deep connection men need to have.

[7:20] Men have not been around to raise their sons. They’ve been raised by mothers.

[8:45] What do men currently struggle with the most? Has this trend changed over the last 30 years?

[10:10] The way men communicate has been disrupted by technology.

[12:15] Do Millennial men lack grit?

[13:15] There’s a weird mix of resentment and entitlement in the average Millennial man.

[16:40] Millennial men are seeking more of their masculine side when they come to Phil.

[21:30] The ideal is to have both male and female traits. Values from the mother and grit from the father.

[23:35] How does Phil help with developing grit?

[30:05] Men are inclined to be loners, so Phil recommends joining a community to build a stronger bond with others.

[32:10] Where does your self-worth come from? For men, it’s tied up in activities and what they can do for other people.

[35:25] Young men tend to have less competition with older men.

[39:10] What’s the importance of being challenged?

[41:45] Where is masculinity headed? It’s going beyond blind competition.

[46:50] Men’s work tends to be much more open these days and more people are aware of it.

[49:10] What does legacy look like to Phil?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Iron John by Robert Bly

Paradise Lost by John Milton

Music Credit:

Parlange & Latenite Automatic (

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